I procrastinate. I love that word. It’s so long and complicated and it sounds so impressive…unless you know what it means. A politician could make it sound so great.
Ladies and gentlemen, I was born to procrastinate. I believe in it. I believe this country has never seen someone more dedicated to procrastination, to ensuring that we all have the right to procrastinate. Don’t let others take this right from you. Vote for me and we will all dedicate ourselves to this important goal.
Imagine the word democracy in the above; or justice…alas, it is procrastination. And procrastination isn’t good. It means doing tomorrow what you should have done today; it means putting off facing a task, a decision, whatever. When I need to do something, I do it and I do it fast. I can whip my house into shape faster than most people can imagine. I can write articles, blog posts, users manuals – fast and very professional…I can be up and out of the house in less than 5 minutes, with no notice. I am super fast as a technical writer, a recognized help author using several industry tools. I can multi-task, delegate, anything…unless…I don’t have to.
I am a strong believer in waiting until push comes to shove. If I had been graced with twins, I might have even given them those names. Meet Push…only when Push comes to Shove, do things really begin to happen.
So, what am I procrastinating about now? I have to write a proposal for a project – that’s easy after a nice meeting yesterday, and I’ll do it. I have to review the latest edit on the instruction manual for our course; someone else did all the work, so I really only have to take a look. I’ll do it today…really, I will! I need to go through a detailed list of outstanding items for the accountant. I hate this and I’ll try, but I can’t promise. Sunday at the latest, really. And, I need to send out two files to students – that’ll take 1 minute and as soon as I finish here, I’m going to do that. Really! And, hardest of hard, I need to write a letter and it’s complicated.
I have to sum up my thoughts to someone who feels differently than I do, explain about life decisions and different paths we choose. Sometimes, writing is about taking your heart out of your body and struggling to express what is inside. Sometimes, you know that people will accept it; other times, you accept that they won’t but know there is honor in the telling.
Yes, there is honor in the telling, but I want more. I want the recipient to understand something that isn’t ready to be understood; to feel something that isn’t ready to be felt. I don’t much care for Cat Stevens and his anti-Israel politics, but give the man his due, this has always been a song that I’ve loved.
I was once like you are now, and I know that it’s not easy,
To be calm when you’ve found something going on.
But take your time, think a lot
For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not.
I have to believe that even if this person isn’t here tomorrow, she’ll be back and that her dreams will ultimately lead her to home.
Without questions, a classic…
Oh, how many times have I thought of that song in relation to this matsav!? To quote Cat Stevens, “I know [she has] to go away.” I know the task ahead of you is difficult and what you write will make me cry. I’m already crying a few times a day, starting with this post.